"The best things in life aren't things."

Art Buchwald

"I came here tonight because when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible."

Harry from When Harry met Sally

i've let it out

told him how i feel

told him that the lack of communication doesn't fit at all into my vision of a relationship

told him that i may not always know what i want but that i know what i don't want

he's making some efforts

but i'm not sure he got the point though

i feel i'm taking my distance already

i'm not sure about this relation

i don't trust him for some things

i'm not sure at all

yesterday i went for a walk at lunch break as i always do when the weather is ok. there's a park nearby, green and quiet.

yesterday, as i walked, suddenly i smelled a particular perfume,

which reminded me immediatly of:

Heidelbeeren ( kind of blueberries ).

Funny, walking in Lausanne, suddenly catching this smell and being reminded of this fruit. And many other memories being related for me with it.

Sylt, ocean, salt, storm, sand, happiness, dunes, Heidekraut, tough climate, iodine, .... back to my roots ?

my summer-vacation is over

this kind of pisses me off, honestly

he has left for vacation with his kids three weeks ago

he'll be back in a week

he doesn't seem to miss me

only one text message when they arrived at destination

i send one message a week to wish shabat shalom

only the first one he wished me the same

but he replies to my messages

and, to be very honest, i have the feeling that he is taking vacation from everything here, including me

the more i think about this / his behaviour the more it is annoying me

i don't like lack of communication, not in my work, not in my private environment, and surely not with my partner

this does not fit into my vision of a relationship,

at all

i'm tempted to to quit him

but i reason to myself that i'll wait and see how his reactions and actions will be when he returns home

so

i'll wait and see and observe and be careful

and decide